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Your Guide on How to Choose a Sex Toy, According To An Expert.

Your Guide on How to Choose a Sex Toy, According To An Expert.

By Syd Morris

Sex toys are truly one of the greatest pleasures in life (pun intended). Sex toys are for everyone who wants to use one. They can increase pleasure, intimacy, and arousal all over your body and for all genitals.  If you haven’t tried one, want to, but don’t know where to start, you’ve come to the right place.

We’re glad you’ve made it! Here you’ll find:

  • A comprehensive guide on how to choose a sex toy that’s perfect for your body and your needs;

  • 7 things you should consider when choosing a sex toy; and

  • A mini quiz to help you find your perfect sex toy.

If you’re unfamiliar with the different types of toys out there, pause here and discover Your Guide to the Different Types of Sex Toys. You’ll get a comprehensive overview on all things sex toys. After reading that, you’ll be all set to join back here and find out which one is right for you.

Oh, and if after reading this you want some more hands-on assistance, you can chat with the Pepper virtual or in-store concierge to ask any questions, see toy demonstrations, and more. It’s our pleasure to help you.

So, without further ado, let’s get into it!

1. Body Part

A common misconception is that sex toys can only be used on vulvas. But the clitoris and vulvas are just the tip of the iceberg! There are sex toys that can be used for anal penetration, g-spot stimulation, prostate stimulation, on nipples, testicles, penises, labia, in mouths, and so much more. Name a body part and there’s probably a toy you can use on it.

If you’re wanting to use it for penetration, it is especially important to keep in mind what you will be penetrating with that toy. Specifically, if you’re going to be using a toy for anal penetration, make sure to use get toy with a base so that there’s no chance of it slipping in further than it should. Things can’t disappear into your vagina, but they can get a bit lost in your butt if there isn’t a base. 

No matter the toy, but especially for any toy that you’ll be using for penetration, make sure to lube up! (We’ll talk about the specific types of lube under the “materials” section).

We’ve talked a lot about penetrating, but there are also toys that can be used on body parts besides genitals. A soft whip or a set of restraints can be the perfect addition to spicy things up even before getting down and dirty.

2. When You’re Using It

When choosing a sex toy, consider when you’ll most likely be using it. Sometimes there’s nothing hotter than taking things public. If you’ve been wanting to try running errands, having a date night out, or picking the kids up from school while also having a little secret, there are perfect toys that have bluetooth capabilities, are portable, and discrete. 

The Club Vibe is a perfect bluetooth vibrator that can be slipped right into panties and worn in and outside of the bedroom. It’s perfect for long distance intimacy or can be a spicy secret that just you and your partner(s) have while you’re out and about. Give your partner(s) full control of the remote and go out on the town! 

The Booty Plug Luxury Set is great for solo or partnered use. Whether it’s just you, or you and your partner, slip one of these gold plated steel anal plugs in for some extra stimulation during sex or out and about. And if you’re like me and need to bring your toys on all vacations, the Grand Bullet Mini Vibrator is the perfect unassuming travel size toy. It’s waterproof, can be used internally and externally, and packs a punch despite its size.

Just because you won’t be in the bedroom doesn’t mean you can’t put these toys to good use.

3. Who’s Involved

Some toys really shine when they are the solo performer and some like to be more of a complement to the sex that you and your partner(s) have. When choosing a sex toy, think about who will be using it, who you want to benefit from it, and what body parts you want stimulated in that process. 

If you have a vulva and are looking for some self care solo sex time, a rabbit vibrator would be the perfect place to start. It’s a toy that is incredibly versatile as it can be used with or without vibrations, internally, externally, and both at the same time. You can use it in a number of positions so that it can adapt to what works best for your body. If you have a penis and are looking for an extra hand, a stroker can be a similar solution. You can use it during alone time or with others to give that hand job some extra umph.

Now, if you’re wanting a toy that’s a bit more well versed in playing well with everyone, the Crescendo is exactly what you’re looking for. Let this toy do it all while you focus on connecting with whoever else is in the room. Bend it to hit whatever spot or spots you’re going for. That can mean for her, for him, or for them. For her and her. For him and him. For them and them. Whatever combo your brain can wrap itself around, you can wrap Crescendo around.

There’s toys for solo play, couples, groups, and everything in between. No number is too big or too small for the perfect toy, it’s just a matter of finding which one is the best fit for you and whoever is with you!

4. Noise Level

Whether it’s living with a roommate (or kids), being home for the holidays, or going on a getaway, sometimes having a toy that makes noise just isn’t practical. The thought of getting caught can be hot, but actually getting caught when you didn’t want to be may be a little scary (for everyone involved). Luckily there are tons of incredible toys that are just as amazing without making a peep, but they might have you making noise, so buyer beware.

Good for solo or partnered penetration of any kind, dildos are always reliable to be a good time for everyone. The Avant Dildo is even harness compatible if you’re wanting a more hands on approach while using it on your partner. 

Did you know there are some sex toys that you can even use for meditation? Have a quiet and calming night in with a Chakrub. They are made of rose quartz crystals and each one correlates with a different chakra. This is the perfect bedside table toy that you can use every night for pleasure of more than one kind. And if anyone does walk in during some solo sex time, just tell them you’re…meditating.

5. Sensation

All bodies and genitals are different, so you might have to play around for a bit to find out what sensations you like. Vibration is one of the most popular sensations that sex toys have, however if you aren’t a fan or are just wanting to try something new, there are many more to test out!

If you are wanting clitoral or nipple sucking stimulation, there are a number of suction toys that can be a great alternative to vibration. If you enjoy having someone suck on your nipples or clit, definitely give suction toys a try. On the other hand, if you have a penis and are more into textures, getting a stroker with a pattern in it could take your orgasms to the next level. 

We’ll go more into materials and the different sensations they give under #7, so make sure to keep reading.

6. Price

Price is an important consideration when choosing a sex toy. Investing in a high quality adult toy is 100% worth it, but there are some times that you want to treat yourself without needing to fit it into the budget. You can get an amazing sex toy for under $50 or even under $30, depending on what you’re looking for, so don’t let high price tags turn you away! And always make sure you’re checking the sale section on the Pepper site for some amazing deals. 

However, if you’re looking to splurge, the price will definitely pay off for some of the state of the art sex toys. What’s even better is that so many of these toys can be used by two or more people, so it’s more bang for your buck! If you and your partner both have vulvas and enjoy penetration, the 2.0 Internal Vibrator takes double-sided toys to a whole new level. It has real time feedback where it mirrors the sensation of one side to the other through Kegal muscles. Talk about intimacy!

Whatever your price point is, there’s definitely a toy for you. So don’t walk on by the shop without taking a peek in.

7. Material

The last thing to take into consideration when you choose a sex toy is the type of material you want your toy to be made out of. There are a few common types of materials: silicone, plastic, metal, and glass. Each material has a different purpose and sensation when being used.


Silicone is the most flexible material and incredibly easy to clean. Vibrators and dildos are often made of silicone and this makes it so that the toy can move with your body and be bent into whatever position works best for you. The one important thing to note is that when using lube and toys together, silicone toys can’t be paired with silicone lube. So whenever you’re bringing out your silicone toys to play, make sure to have a water-based lube on hand as well. 

Metal & Glass

Metal and glass are much firmer and completely solid in their shape. They can absorb temperature a lot more, which can add an extra sensation with their use. Popping them in the freezer or running them under hot water before use is a game changer! Metal and glass toys aren’t flexible, but some people find them easier to insert during penetration because they are so smooth.

General Materials

There’s no right or wrong material for your sex toy to be made out of, as long as it’s a high quality material, and made without any chemicals that harm your body. If you want to feel the different materials out for yourself, visit the Pepper Toy Bar in person for a hands on demo!

There are a lot of things to take into consideration when choosing a sex toy, but one of the best ways to find out what you like is by doing some field research. If you use a toy that you aren’t a fan of, don’t let that discourage you from venturing out into other types of toys! If toys are something that you want to incorporate into your sex like and still have questions on what to get, chat with one of the Pepper virtual or in-store concierge. There are no wrong or weird questions or desires, and once you find a toy you love, you’ll wonder how you ever lived without it. 

Picking A Sex Toy Quiz

If you loved taking Buzzfeed or magazine quizzes and always wished there was one to tell you what type of adult toy you should try, then you’re in luck! Try out this mini 4 question quiz to point you in the right direction of what toy might be the perfect addition to your bedside table drawer. 

  1. Do you want a genital specific toy?

    1. Yes, vulva/clitoris

    2. Yes, penis

    3. Yes, penetration (anal or vaginal)

    4. Nope

  2. Do you want an internal or external toy?

    1. Both

    2. External

    3. Internal

    4. I don’t know

  3. What is a must-have feature for you?

    1. Good for solo play

    2. Good for partner play

    3. Easy to clean

    4. Versatile

  4. What sensation are you looking for?

    1. Vibration or suction

    2. Gripping or stroking

    3. Easy penetration

    4. A combo


(A quick reminder that while these may be a fun place to start your search, make sure to explore around and find what works for you).

If you picked mostly A’s try out the Pepper Indulge Rabbit Vibrator

If you picked mostly B’s try out the Pepper Ring-A-Ding-Ding Cock Rings

If you picked mostly C’s try out the Anal Education Set

If you picked mostly D’s try out the Gender Neutral Vibrator

Sydney (Syd) Morris (she/her/), is a white, cisgender, queer, Sex Educator in Seattle who is passionate about making the worlds of sex education and sex tech easier to navigate regardless of beliefs, experiences, or identities. She is a Master of Arts in Education candidate at Antioch University, where her research investigates where adults go to find answers to their questions about sex. Syd approaches sexuality education from an intersectional and pleasure-centered lens. She believes that every part of you is relevant to your sexuality and you inherently deserve to experience pleasure in the ways that feel good for you.

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