Stigmas surrounding penises and erectile dysfunction.
The shame that is often attached to erectile dysfunction is central to the problem. And the way we talk about erections, particularly the language we use, just raises unrealistic expectations for all involved. So, let’s start with some general rules before doing a deep-dive into the world of erections to start adjusting our expectations, and keep these four pointers in mind as we delve into the variety of causes and options for penis-owners and their erections.
ED terms matter
And anytime we hear “dysfunction” we automatically attach negative sentiment to it. We will use the term “erectile dysfunction” throughout this article because it is the most common term we collectively use to describe the variation a penis-owner experiences in relation to their erections. Note: the dysfunction is attached to the erection and not the penis. Generally, a penis is perfectly functional whether it is erect or not.
So let’s keep in mind that penises are totally functional in their non-erect form and all penises vary in size, shape, length and levels of rigidity. Moving forward we can start to lean towards the idea that an erection is something that is “experienced” instead of thinking of it like a light switch that is either on or off and we can move away from using the term “dysfunction” altogether to describe variance in erection experiences.
An erect penis is not required for pleasure
Even if you suffer from erectile dysfunction or have a hard time getting and keeping an erection, an erect penis is not required for pleasure. The penis, testicles, perineum and anus are full of nerve endings and pleasure sensors. A lot of penis owners are socialized from a young age to depend on an erect penis to signal to them that they are experiencing pleasure.
However, an erection is typically the result of pleasurable stimuli, and not the cause of it. Once you start paying attention to the pleasure instead of the penis’ response to it, you’d be surprised at how much you can enjoy. Particularly, the corona of the penis (the ridge that forms where the shaft of the penis meets the head) is jam packed full of pleasure sensing nerve endings and is primed for intimate play.
A soft penis can penetrate
You will discover a whole new world of sexual experiences once you let go of waiting for an erection to start the show. Make sure to use lots of lube and discover the ways both you and your partner respond to playing with a soft penis. The skin to skin action alone will release a ton of feel-good endorphins and a soft penis can totally be inserted as long as everyone is relaxed and having a fun time exploring one another.
Penises change over time
Just like the rest of our bodies, the penis also changes as we age. The common misunderstanding is that erection frequency decreases much later in life, however many men report changes in penis rigidity starting in their mid-late twenties and onwards.