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How to Choose the Perfect Vibrator

better sex

How to Choose the Perfect Vibrator

Kaisha-Dyan McMillanOctober 1, 2020

New to vibrators and don’t know where to begin? Here’s a foolproof guide to choosing a vibe both of you will enjoy.

Nothing gets our hearts fluttering quite like a vibrator.

From massage to masturbation to sex, a great vibe offers couples a way to add a little pepper to playtime. The vibrator’s ability to send shivers directly to the most intimate parts of our bodies opens all kinds of doors during quality time together.

And we also think using a vibe during solo play is a wonderful way to treat yourself and get a little warmed up for playtime together. After all, when each of you is feeling relaxed and sexy, the urge to love on one anotherfeels that much better.

We think vibes are the best sex toys for beginners (and we’re not alone). But how should you two go about finding the right one?

When couples are looking for the first vibrator to best suit their needs, we take it back to basics by asking Who, What, and Where:

“While vibrators for women tend to get the lion’s share of the focus, there are also vibrators designed for couples to use together.”

Who is the primary user?

Vibrators typically get our bodies tingling by offering external stimulation, internal stimulation, or a combination of both. Since everybody is different, what gets your waves undulating (cowabunga!) might look totally different for your partner.

While vibrators for women tend to get the lion’s share of the focus, there are also vibrators designed for couples to use together.

Vibrators are a win-win for all couples as far as we’re concerned, but determining what’s important to the primary user of the new toy can really help narrow down the many available options.

“Size, color, and texture are also important factors for selecting your dream vibe.”

What should it look and feel like?

When it’s time to choose the perfect vibrator, let’s be honest: unless you’re feeling the vibe’s look and feel, neither you nor the toy will be getting turned on. And as it turns out, experts like Julia Feldman of Giving the Talk not only recommend shopping around, but investing in more than one.

“The thing people don't realize about vibrators is how nuanced they are,” she says. “First of all, the materials are different. A really good silicone vibrator has a completely unique aesthetic and feel to it rather than a nickel-plated one, not mention there is a whole world of different settings. You definitely need a really good quality one, at least.”

Available in a variety of materials including rubber, plastic, silicone, and metal, vibrators offer unique sensations based upon each material type. Plus there’s a range of factors – from body sensitivity (it’s best to avoid phthalates) to the kind of lube you’re using (silicone lube and silicone toys aren’t compatible), to how to clean and care for the toy – which may impact which vibrator you ultimately choose.

Size, color, and texture are also important factors for selecting your dream vibe. Whether choosing between discrete or worthy of display, realistic or novelty, textured or smooth, pick a model that’ll make your heart (and other things) throb each time you see it.

And don’t forget about power.

Those who are more sensitive to vibration might opt for a basic battery-operated model with lower power output. But others among us might want something stronger with multiple functions - like our beloved Crave Pocket Vibe, which combines intense power with interchangeable silicone tips and a classic, discrete silhouette.

Hold all our calls, please.

“Your attraction to a certain vibrator might ultimately be determined by where on your body it’s going to works its magic.”

Where will you use your vibrator?

First things first: where on your body will you be using your new toy?

Earlier we mentioned external versus internal – more specifically, this could look like clitoral versus g-spot or vaginal stimulation, penis versus prostate stimulation, or perineum versus anal play. Your attraction to a certain vibrator might ultimately be determined by where on your body it’s going to works its magic.

But here’s another thing to consider: where in (or out of) your home will you be using your vibrator the most?

If playtime is typically in the bedroom near a power outlet, maybe you want a plug-in model, but that might not be the best option for vacation sex.

In that case, a rechargeable model might be the ticket to paradise. And, if you want to get it on in the water, there’s a vibe for that too.

The point is, when it comes time to finding vibrators for beginners, couples who ask questions first will be all set to get it on later. And remember: bringing a vibrator into the mix doesn’t mean there is a deficiency between you two – in fact, it can actually be a promise of something quite the opposite.

How’s that for a win-win?

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