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Ready or Knot, It’s Blindfold & Bondage Time

better sex

Ready or Knot, It’s Blindfold & Bondage Time

Kaisha-Dyan McMillanNovember 4, 2019

Explore the boundaries of a new comfort zone with these useful tips and inspiration.

Exploring the boundaries of a new comfort zone takes time and energy. That’s why it’s so easy to keep things fairly status quo in the bedroom.

Still, have you ever thought about how nice it would be to give up control every once in a while and surrender fully to pleasure?

If you answered yes, it sounds like you might be ready to try a little light bondage and your main squeeze.

Wait, blindfold and bondage?

Hear us out.

A couple might look to light bondage and blindfolding for a variety of reasons. For one thing, it takes a lot of trust for one of you to completely relinquish control over to the other. Even we can’t get over how sexy that is.

For another, many of us who’ve never tried it might consider the idea to be pretty naughty, even taboo. If you ask us, there are few things more exhilarating than doing something you’re not “supposed” to do in private with each other.

Last but certainly not least, limiting movement and/or sight actually heightens your other senses even more. That means everything a person experiences—every sound, smell, taste, and sensation—is more intense than usual.

(And yes, we do mean everything.)

All we’re talking about is more bondage-lite than full BDSM—and, here’s what we mean:

“When it comes to tips for this new frontier of play, here’s the biggest one of all: communication.”

Tie yourselves up in the details

So we all know “Fifty Shades of Grey” was a work of fiction, not an instruction manual. Introducing blindfold and bondage to your relationship for the first time isn’t the kind of thing you want to spontaneously spring on someone after they get home from work. 

When it comes to tips for this new frontier of play, here’s the biggest one of all: communication.

Before diving in, have a conversation about each of your needs, desires, and expectations around this new adventure. While picturing men or women in light bondage is sexy to some of us, for others the idea of being physically and visually restrained brings up a lot of feelings—so talk about them.

This conversation is also when the two of you define specifics. Decide together who’s getting tied up first and who’s directing the action. Be clear about which body parts (legs? arms? wrists?) are getting tied up, and how loose or tight those restraints should be.

Go shopping for accessories together, like the perfect leather handcuffs and sexy blindfold. Define which activities are a yes (thumbs up for oral and penetrative sex?), versus what’s totally off-limits (are anal sex and spanking a little too far?).

“The way we see it, communicating with each other about exploring sex in this new way is about more than just logistics. It also gives the two of you an opportunity to deepen your connection…”

This is also a great time to establish a safe word. Since all variety of expressions fly out of our mouths during sex, agree on a word each of you can use when either of you wants to direct the other person to slow down or stop. The more random and less sexual, the better - here are a few in our rotation this week: rutabaga, peanut butter, and duvet.

The way we see it, communicating with each other about exploring sex in this new way is about more than just logistics. It also gives the two of you an opportunity to deepen your connection through conversation. Simply feeling comfortable, safe, and free enough to discuss what this new experience could look like together is intimate in and of itself - not to mention, a major turn-on.

Ready or knot

How to do light blindfolding and bondage is entirely up to you and your playmate. That’s why it’s important to keep those lines of communication open as you define what the experience looks like for both of you.

Remember, all senses are heightened for the one being bound. That means for whoever’s running the show, there’s no shortage of ways to drive your person wild.

Try adding ylang-ylang to the diffuser or light some incense for a little aromatic seduction. Get their mouths watering by feeding them a sexy bite of something juicy and delicious. And when they’re not expecting it, lightly brush a finger or tongue along a sensitive part of their body. See how your person responds to everything and allow that to lead the way.

When it comes to deepening your connection by finding fresh ways to play, experimenting with blindfolding and mild bondage is the perfect reason to say, “why knot”?

It may just leave you both begging for more. Trust us. 

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